sometimes i feel like this has been my life, especially in the last years, except ... where is Art in there? but i know it is not true. there has been much between the lines.

today was my last day in the office. tomorrow i will be officially unemployed. it has happened. if you have read this mess long enough and listened to some of my fussing about life in the fluorescent prison, you might think i left the place jumping and singing. wrong. it was weird. i feel weird. i left feeling i had left something undone. something wrong. probably it is not true, but ... i'm not sure. i felt no joyous explosion, as i have felt at other endings. i managed to say some goodbyes, and left without tears, although i was a bit worried they might seep out. there are some people i have really liked there. the goodbyes have been stringing out for a month, so today wasn't too traumatic, but still ... hard. it has been over 10 years there. a big part of my life.

anyway, onward, i guess. now a week of packing, with an interval in the city with the poet, where i have made him promise we won't sit around being sad. i don't even have that much packing left, as i have been stringing it out, too. tomorrow, the artTable will shut down. i'm ready.

this is all exciting. but scary, too.